Tuesday, November 30, 2021

What I've Been Doing To Usurp Young Minds

I teach college. Or, well, I am a professor in a small private university and so I occasionally speak words out loud to classrooms of assorted technologies, air, furniture, and students. Over the years (omg - so many years) I have developed an occasional habit of not listening to myself and wandering off in my mind to play video games while lecturing.

That isn't something I approve of (nor do I approve of taking naps while driving, nor letting my face show my true feelings when my wife talks about Downtown Abbey or whatever it's called). If my lectures are so boring that even I don't want to listen, we should pity the poor students sitting in the classroom! One solution I have to keep students (and <cough> me) interested is to introduce unusual (BUT ON-TASK) ideas once in a while.

Example: Making up blended words to convey concepts in Sensation and Perception such as "smeat" which is sorta what happens when you smell dog poop on your shoe... you are smelling an odor and your nose is kinda eating it, too. So smell + eat = smeat! (After all, isn't that what somebody once did when they came up with the term "transduction" - seriously... isn't it? Asking for a friend.) I did this very one today, in fact.

Example: Applying principles of Social Psychology to a lecture on how to form and maintain a cult! (A benevolent dictatorship?)

Example: Applying statistics (chi square) in the Methods in Behavioral Research class to FINALLY put to rest the debate about which is better, "over" or "under" when it comes to TP hanging with the bonus resolution to the question of TP usage (folded vs. bunched). Want to know what we found? Take the class, not all education is free!
Example: Back to Sensation and Perception, I have developed a practical application of the vocabulary word "foveate" for personal gains and benefits. NOT to be confused with orbisculate, which is when a grapefruit targets your eye with a juicy squirt. Rather, to foveate is to adjust your gaze on something, like the grapefruit, so that the image is targeted on a specific location on your retina (i.e., the fovea). 
Use "foveate" to claim the last slice of pizza, cake, pie, or lasagna (etc.) by simply saying, "Oh my gosh! Someone foveated all over this last slice... Does anyone want it?" BAM! It's likely to be yours without any fuss! 

Benefits: (1) You get that last slice on the legit (not your job to build other people's vocabulary), (2) you come across as the nice guy for letting everyone know about that disgusting sounding thing that happened to it, and (3) you are viewed as generous for first offerring the slice to others before taking it on yourself. 
Maybe this one should have been kept a secret... if everyone knows it, then it loses its power.

As I write this, we are nearing the end of a long semester of lectures through warm soggy masks. The list above needs to be built upon and I simply lack the effort right now to rehash the past few months. I will return occasionally to build the list so that there are more than four examples. Be patient... you can see that when it comes to blogging, I am a:

Prolific
  Rigorous
    Observant
      Cuddly
        Relatable
          Active
            Smart
              Tenatious
                Insightful
                  Nerdy
                    Affectionate
                      Trustworthy
                        Organized and
                          Reliable
BLOGGER!
[Poster images via FOTOR.COM a very cool site you should check out!]

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